Friday, February 22, 2008

Inn Trouble - Best-Laid Schemes...

My son-in-law has a history of thwarted good intentions. Three years ago, his idea of an anniversary gift for his wife wasn’t deemed personal enough by Rayanne. Neither the portable phone nor the alarm clock earned him any points with my daughter. At that particular point in time, Rayanne had admonished Anson they didn’t need to spend any money on each other
for their anniversary, as money was in scarce supply for their household. The flowers sent the next day, an atonement effort, proved as futile as did the less-than-personal gifts he’d given to his wife, and it took a surprise birthday party days later to get him out of the doghouse.

Anson’s parents celebrated their Fiftieth Wedding Anniversary on February 9th in Belmont, Mississippi. Barbara and I attended the affair to congratulate them on their marital milestone.

While we were there, Anson pulled us aside to share, "Next Friday night, I’m taking Rayanne out to a nice restaurant in Alabama for our Twelfth Anniversary. What she doesn’t know is we’re spending the night in a nice motel. That’s the surprise."

How priceless was the look on his face. His pleasure in his secret plans could not be contained. Something so well thought out had to express itself, and it virtually erupted as a broad smile across his face.

As a guy, I admit to admiring his scheme and could only imagine that his every expectation for the grand evening would be realized. What could possibly go wrong? Arrangements had been made for his parents to keep the children, dinner and motel reservations were made, and there was surely a plan in place to sneak the luggage for the overnight stay unnoticed and into the family van. It was beautiful, I tell you, beautiful.

But as the Burns stated, "The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men...(are often thwarted – in today’s parlance)."

I don’t know at what point in the evening Anson shared with Rayanne his scheme, but I would imagine it would have been near the end of dinner.

And, I can picture him leaning toward her in a candlelit Kodak moment and exclaiming, "Guess what? We have the rest of the night to ourselves. The girls are spending the night at Gran-Gran’s, and we’re sleeping at the Starlight Inn, the swanky new one up the street."

And I can equally envision my daughter’s reaction. "I don’t have
my makeup or a change of clothes. You know I don’t like surprises, and I especially don’t like sleeping in a motel bed somebody else has slept in. It freaks me out."

"Don’t worry, honey," he surely must have said, "I’ve packed everything you need right down to your favorite jeans. Our bags are under the blanket in the back of the van. Anyway the motel is almost brand new; the bed may never have been slept in."

I have no official word on what transpired in the waning hours of the evening and really no official word until after nine o’clock Saturday morning. That’s when Rayanne phoned her mother to give her an update.

In that conversation Rayanne stated much of what I attributed to her above, adding, "Anson didn’t pack my hairbrush so I’m stuck here with a wet head until he gets back from Wal-Mart or wherever he finds one. And, my ‘favorite jeans’ he brought have bleach stains all over them."

The gist of it was Rayanne was not the happy camper one might have expected. When Barbara pointed out what a nice gesture it was on Anson’s part to have planned a special time for them, Rayanne stewed, "You’re taking his side, just like his mother did."

To which I would’ve asked, "What’s wrong with you, girl? For most women, Anson’s sort of thoughtfulness would have been joyously received had their husbands done the same for them!"

Alas, I can’t be too hard on my own child. I did help with her raising, and her gene pool does have a few of my ornery genes in it. So it’s not like she’s perfect, which is something Jason will be proud to know I said, but I admit to being a little perplexed by her response to the situation.

Perhaps, it’ll be as Barbara said, "You need to write this down, Rayanne, so in ten years or so, or when y’all celebrate your Fiftieth Wedding Anniversary, you can read it and laugh about it."

For me, I don’t have to wait; I can laugh about it right now.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Annie Up Close


I have never been fortunate enough to be near enough to a celebrity to rub shoulders, so to speak, and by celebrity I’m thinking of movie star, professional athlete, a governor, or the President of the United States. But then, I don’t go looking for them just for an autograph or photo opportunity. Oops…I thought of a pro athlete.
Tim McCarver of the St. Louis Cardinals was at the Sunflower Food Store #43, on East Main Street in Tupelo at the time I worked there in 1963. He was autographing 8 by 10 glossies, and I had him sign one for my then little brother, James. And, I was in within a few feet of Ernie Haase of Signature Sound fame, the other night at the Gaither Concert in Tupelo, but that’s all the famous people I can think of that I was near enough to have touched, until I ran into Annie last Thursday.Annie, for those of you who don’t have email or haven’t heard of "you tube," is something of an Internet celebrity. She arrived in my inbox a couple of years ago as an attachment to a forwarded message. Okay, she didn’t arrive in my inbox, but she was the subject of the humorous video clip in which she was featured. The video clip was named "Why I Quit Court Reporting." It is approximately two minutes in length, but it’s very apparent that the title fits the situation. Annie, who lives in Ruleville, Mississippi, is sworn in for a legal deposition, the nature of which is not revealed, but she is asked to verify whether the signature on a certain piece of paper is hers.
Annie may have a speech impediment or else she may be a special-needs individual, and if either is true, I apologize for any humor I find in viewing the clip and would have her know I’m not laughing at her but rather laughing at the predicament of the court reporter. Annie, when asked to raise her right hand, raised her left hand, and when asked a second time to raise her right hand, she raised it and kept both arms held high over her head. When asked if she promised to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, it was evident she agreed to do so, but her answer which I would perceive to be along the line of "Yeah, I promise to tell the whole truth," is unintelligible speech, and my translation is purely guesswork based on the circumstances and the question she had been presented. Continue reading>>









Friday, February 08, 2008

Urban Lepers

You see them standing outside, sometimes alone, sometimes with one or two others, and sometimes their numbers are larger. They are defiant but orderly. Society has deemed them unfit and a danger to its greater good. We find their habit repugnant and unclean, but they refuse to change their lifestyle to meet our demands. Cold weather, hot weather, mild weather, rain or shine, outside is the only public environment where their behavior is acceptable. Pity these—they are smokers.

Tobacco use, particularly cigarette smoking, was once considered chic and fashionable. Smoking helped settle ones nerves, so the military encouraged its use among servicemen during wartime. Hollywood icons smoked, as did all of filmdom. Businessmen smoked, and while smoking among the fairer sex was once risqué, it grew to become acceptable as the popularity of cigarette smoking grew. Juvenile delinquents smoked, but so did juveniles who were not delinquents.

Smoking was considered manly, and advertisements for cigarettes often portrayed men doing things such as riding horseback in Wyoming or Montana then pausing to light up a popular brand of cigarettes. Smoking was a form of sociableness whether found at a nightclub or a country club or the Elks club. Smokers smoked with little regard for persons who did not smoke and often were careless where the ashes fell or where burning stubs were crushed.

Until medical research pointed to tobacco as a possible cause for cancer, most smokers did not realize the risks associated with smoking. Even after written warnings by the Surgeon General of the United States were mandated on each pack, most ignored the message until the evidence overwhelmingly supported the earlier research. And today, the evidence still goes unheeded by some, in spite of more research linking heart disease to smoking.

Sociologists are better at explaining the differences between generations than I am, but I believe the political push to ban smoking from all public places, even in small towns such as Pontotoc, is directly related to a characteristic of the generation of Baby Boomers. I’ve heard enough speeches on trends and generational differences over the years to remember one of the defining aspects of a Boomer is the "it’s-all-about-me syndrome." And, it’s a characteristic I see again and again in those born between 1946 and 1964. These are the generation born from the time GIs returned home after World War II until shortly after the Kennedy assignation. Today, Baby Boomers are the ones in leadership positions in churches, schools, and in local governments. Continue reading>>




Saturday, February 02, 2008

Mayor Stafford

Helped Jump Start Pontotoc

The death of Howard Stafford caught me by surprise. After all, had not Barbara and I talked to him roughly two months ago as we were leaving Sunshine Health Care in Pontotoc? Stopping to chat came natural to Howard Stafford. He was never one to talk ones ear off, but he did show enough concern and interest to make one feel appreciated.

It had been some time since I had seen our former Mayor, but he looked well, clad in what one might describe as a western look, though in his case his rugged features and wide brimmed hat reminded me more of an Indiana Jones figure.

"I came to check on my sister and a brother-in-law," he responded when we asked the nature of his visit.

Ours was not a lengthy conversation and was more of an exchange of greetings that happened to consist of expressions of concern for our respective families.

Howard Stafford was a member of America’s Greatest Generation which consists, in part, of individuals who survived the hardships of the Great Depression only to be confronted with stopping fascism in Europe and imperialism in the Far East. Howard served his country in the Army, spending four years in the South Pacific. When he returned to the States, Howard maintained a Standard Oil dealership for several years before turning his attention to
politics.

Howard Stafford was elected Mayor of Pontotoc in 1965 and served as Mayor for 28 consecutive years. Pontotoc and Pontotoc County owe its years of "industrial revolution," largely to the efforts of Howard Stafford.

Howard’s management style distinguished him from all who had previously held the mayor’s office, and his uniqueness has not been duplicated since. Mayor Stafford was not one to take no for an answer. Persons who knew him far better than I have called his methods unorthodox.

At his funeral, on January 26, 2008, Judge Charles Thomas noted Howard’s heroes were Geronimo and Gen. Douglas MacArthur and drew upon similarities of each. Like Geronimo, Mayor Stafford was fearless and like Gen. MacArthur, defeat was not something he could or would accept. Continue reading >>