Inn Trouble - Best-Laid Schemes...

My son-in-law has a history of thwarted good intentions. Three years ago, his idea of an anniversary gift for his wife wasn’t deemed personal enough by Rayanne. Neither the portable phone nor the alarm clock earned him any points with my daughter. At that particular point in time, Rayanne had admonished Anson they didn’t need to spend any money on each other
for their anniversary, as money was in scarce supply for their household. The flowers sent the next day, an atonement effort, proved as futile as did the less-than-personal gifts he’d given to his wife, and it took a surprise birthday party days later to get him out of the doghouse.

Anson’s parents celebrated their Fiftieth Wedding Anniversary on February 9^th in Belmont, Mississippi. Barbara and I attended the affair to congratulate them on their marital milestone.

While we were there, Anson pulled us aside to share, "Next Friday night, I’m taking Rayanne out to a nice restaurant in Alabama for our Twelfth Anniversary. What she doesn’t know is we’re spending the night in a nice motel. That’s the surprise."

How priceless was the look on his face. His pleasure in his secret plans could not be contained. Something so well thought out had to express itself, and it virtually erupted as a broad smile across his face.

As a guy, I admit to admiring his scheme and could only imagine that his every expectation for the grand evening would be realized. What could possibly go wrong? Arrangements had been made for his parents to keep the children, dinner and motel reservations were made, and there was surely a plan in place to sneak the luggage for the overnight stay unnoticed and into the family van. It was beautiful, I tell you, beautiful.

But as the Burns stated, "The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men...(are often thwarted – in today’s parlance)."

I don’t know at what point in the evening Anson shared with Rayanne his scheme, but I would imagine it would have been near the end of dinner.

And, I can picture him leaning toward her in a candlelit Kodak moment and exclaiming, "Guess what? We have the rest of the night to ourselves. The girls are spending the night at Gran-Gran’s, and we’re sleeping at the Starlight Inn, the swanky new one up the street."

And I can equally envision my daughter’s reaction. "I don’t have
my makeup or a change of clothes. You know I don’t like surprises, and I especially don’t like sleeping in a motel bed somebody else has slept in. It freaks me out."

"Don’t worry, honey," he surely must have said, "I’ve packed everything you need right down to your favorite jeans. Our bags are under the blanket in the back of the van. Anyway the motel is almost brand new; the bed may never have been slept in."

I have no official word on what transpired in the waning hours of the evening and really no official word until after nine o’clock Saturday morning. That’s when Rayanne phoned her mother to give her an update.

In that conversation Rayanne stated much of what I attributed to her above, adding, "Anson didn’t pack my hairbrush so I’m stuck here with a wet head until he gets back from Wal-Mart or wherever he finds one. And, my ‘favorite jeans’ he brought have bleach stains all over them."

The gist of it was Rayanne was not the happy camper one might have expected. When Barbara pointed out what a nice gesture it was on Anson’s part to have planned a special time for them, Rayanne stewed, "You’re taking his side, just like his mother did."

To which I would’ve asked, "What’s wrong with you, girl? For most women, Anson’s sort of thoughtfulness would have been joyously received had their husbands done the same for them!"

Alas, I can’t be too hard on my own child. I did help with her raising, and her gene pool does have a few of my ornery genes in it. So it’s not like she’s perfect, which is something Jason will be proud to know I said, but I admit to being a little perplexed by her response to the situation.

Perhaps, it’ll be as Barbara said, "You need to write this down, Rayanne, so in ten years or so, or when y’all celebrate your Fiftieth Wedding Anniversary, you can read it and laugh about it."

For me, I don’t have to wait; I can laugh about it right now.